Moment in time by Janice
‘Yay!’ I yelled.Finally we are here at onekawa pools. Me and Caitlyn
went to the RAINBOW slide we let go of each other.The teacher
yelled out ‘its tea time’ so we all went over and the parents
hand out the sausages. I’ved eated one of the sausages
because I wanted to swim in the pools.Me and Lorena
went to the hot pools.The first pools were warm the 2 one
was hot.Then I went back to the slide again with Caitlyn.
It was home time so our parents drive us back to
PARKVALE school we get our bags and wait for the bell to
ring.When the bell rung I went to room 6 and 7 but
just then I saw my sister walking out on the foot path.
went to the RAINBOW slide we let go of each other.The teacher
yelled out ‘its tea time’ so we all went over and the parents
hand out the sausages. I’ved eated one of the sausages
because I wanted to swim in the pools.Me and Lorena
went to the hot pools.The first pools were warm the 2 one
was hot.Then I went back to the slide again with Caitlyn.
It was home time so our parents drive us back to
PARKVALE school we get our bags and wait for the bell to
ring.When the bell rung I went to room 6 and 7 but
just then I saw my sister walking out on the foot path.
Reflection: Add connecting words to join some sentences.
Need to make sense.
